An Unintentional Insult
I have a friend from Melbourne who I collaborated with on an Agricultural
research project. At first I only knew him as a researcher, but after
a year on the team, we started to know more about each other's background
and family. A year ago, he came to Indonesia with his family and I was
really excited at that time. When I met him and his wife and daughter,
I tried hard to be a nice host. I opened my conversation with his wife
by commenting that her daughter was a beautiful FAT girl. Suddenly his
wife got really annoyed. I just stayed silent and felt confused by her
reaction.
After studying cross-cultural studies at IALF Bali, I realized that I'd
said a stupid thing because Western people get very angry if someone comments
on their being overweight-it's a taboo statement. Luckily my friend and
his family forgave me because they understand about the cultural differences
between Indonesia and Australia and we still have a good relationship
until now. (Emielda Yusiharni)
Reflections from a Returned ADS Student
It's been more than 2 years since I left IALF. Life in Australia treated
me very well and I just got into the swing of things in Sydney. I didn't
experience any culture shock at all, even though it was hard to accommodate
everything in one go, for example, living on my own while at the same
time studying in a completely different environment. I did my own shopping,
cooking and washing and if things got busy with study I often ran out
of groceries.
My first class was horrible, the talking between my lecturer and the
locals sounded like bees buzzing around my head. I had no idea what the
hell they were talking about even though I'd read the course materials
beforehand. Thank God that our program wisely divided students into morning
and evening classes. While it's not meant to separate the locals and overseas
students, inevitably that's what happens. Locals mainly work and study
part-time so they attend the evening class while the international students,
(who are mostly full time students) go to morning classes. I found the
English of international students much more understandable than the Aussie
English. I had such a broad social life that my English improved rapidly.
Being in an international community and living with flat mates with different
nationalities gave me many new life experiences. Friendships were very
useful and helpful too. I usually had my friends to peer review my papers
before submitting them. AusAid also played a tremendous part in assisting
us, by providing mentors whenever we need them.
(Anita Zainul)
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Lack of Eye Contact?
One day I went to Kuta Beach which is a very famous place for leisure
in Bali. There were many foreigners, especially from western countries
there. As an EAP student I wanted to practice speaking to them. I came
up to a small group of women and immediately spoke to one of them. I asked
her , "Could you help me"? She answered, "Sure". Then,
I started to speak to her without looking at her face or eyes because
in Indonesian culture it's not polite to look at a girl's face when you're
speaking to her. Unfortunately, after saying a few sentences, she seemed
to lose interest in my topic and wouldn't answer my questions anymore.
I was really upset and couldn't understand what I'd done wrong. Finally,
I decided that when speaking to western people, we have to look at their
eyes or at least at their faces to show our attention. (La Ode)
Different Customs
My name is Dina and I'm doing my second year of a PhD at the School of
Botany, University of Melbourne. 2 months after starting here, I was invited
to one of my supervisor's farewell lunch at a Thai Restaurant-my first
party. After the lunch I was wondering why people were still sitting there
as if the were waiting for something. Suddenly that 'thing' came-it was
the BILL! As soon as it came everybody got busy calculating what they'd
eaten and drunk. GOSH!!! Then we all had to pay our share. In Indonesia
of course, if you're invited somewhere by your boss or lecturer, you wouldn't
be expected to bring or pay for anything. But I realized this was Australia
not Indonesia so I paid up the A$18 for my share of the food and drink
from my pocket that incidentally only had A$20 in it. Thank God it wasn't
more than A$20. Since then I always take more than A$20 when I'm invited
to a party. (Dina)
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